The Last Time

As of today, this template is officially retired. Goodnight old template, you were enjoyed.

Be The Boy still exists at it's new home, found here. See you there.

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Moving Day

Over the next few days Be The Boy is ditching the old Blogger template and moving to a new Wordpress hosted site. If you see anything strange or if you suddenly can't view the page, don't worry I haven't run off (again). Things will be new and improved soon. Here's a peek at what it will look like. The url will still be www.betheboy.com once the move is done. Thanks for playing along at home.

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Wednesday Adventures

Looking for a good time on a Wednesday, try waking up and getting an emergency root canal. That's what I did this morning. Sure it's not a walk along the beach but it did lead to a great blog post by my wife and a long story that I posted on LA Metblogs earlier about the worst job I ever had.

I'm still hopped up on goofballs but I hope you're having as much fun as I am. See you when the painkillers wear off.

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Los Angeles Courthouse Trials

I got a postcard yesterday informing me that I had failed to appear for jury duty. This was news to me because I don’t remember being summoned to appear but the card tells me I now need to call and talk to someone about how to correct my mistake. When I tried to call I was bounced around an automated phone system until I finally disconnected because there was no useful information.

Unlike many people I don’t mind automated systems, but only if they are helpful and this one is not. You’d think that the Los Angeles Superior Court system would at least have some information I could use; at very least the could connect me to someone who could help me but alas I have no idea what to do next. According to the postcard I could be fined up to $1500 for not showing up...but what happens when I’m trying to show up and the phone system won’t let me? The fact that they send out these postcards tells me that people regularly fail to appear so I assume they would have processes in place to tell me where to go and what to do, but my assumption is proving to be frustratingly wrong.

I’ve been called for jury duty here in Los Angeles before, the last time I had to actually go to court was back in the early days of this blog, October 2003, here is what happened then:


At 7:45 this morning I reported for jury duty with the wrong assumption that by noon I'd be back home sitting on my couch thumbing through the book I had forgotten to bring to court with me. After an interminable orientation process I was called to a courtroom and waited, and waited. It was now 11 AM and I hadn't been told to go home yet...bad sign.

Finally I was told about the case, MURDER, and solicitation of MURDER, trial expected to go 30 days. A woman allegedly poisoned her husband for his insurance the judge pointed out that there she was at the defense table, I waved. I'm a sucker for bad girls you know. In case they wouldn't let me go for financial reasons (my job will only cover 10 days) I had to resort to Plan B.

"Your honor I not only feel that this would cause financial hardship but I also feel I could not render a fair and unbiased judgment because I find girls who commit crimes to be very attractive"

The judge dismissed me before I could give her my number and advised me that financial hardship was a good enough reason, adding that he appreciated my honesty.

I then had to sit around the rest of the day until they excused me from further trials but I must say it was worth it to see the look on the judge and the attorneys faces when I gave my excuse, not to mention the defendant, who was kinda cute in a violently unstable sort of way.

Of course since this time I've moved on to more stable, non murderous girls. That may have been the best thing I've ever done. My sane wife has some really cool stuff going on at her new Anti-Social Networking home. Check it out, failure to appear there could also result in a fine.

More Be The Boy courtroom antics in the archives here.

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Confidential To One Reader

Dear Reader,

You do know that I can see you reading the same portion of my archives every day, right?

Sincerely,

Will

P.S. - there's some new LA Metblogs stuff by me here.

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A Few Links of Note

Following up on my LA Metblogs post about discount videos, another LA blogger has posted a great story of two for one porn deals.

Over at Antisocial Networking, my wife is holding a contest just for nerds, this means you are eligible. Go take a look.

One of my favorite columnists and bloggers, Joe Posnanski, tells us about his best day as a sportswriter. It’s a great read even if you’re not a sports fan.

Check them out; if you don’t like them you can have your money back.

I'll be back with stories and tomfoolery before you know it.

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Where Have I Been?

Has it really been a week since I updated here? Sorry about that, I’ve had a lot going on, most notably I celebrated my first wedding anniversary over the weekend with a trip to Vegas. Some highlights:

- Our anniversary dinner at the Verandah was spectacular, really, really spectacular.

- The hotel pay per view movie options included a feature called “She’s Got Balls”.

- We didn’t go broke. We set a budget and stuck to it, with money to spare. Not busting is a new development for me as it’s been years since I lasted an entire weekend in Vegas without hitting an ATM at least once. On the downside we didn’t win any money but losing much less is a step in the right direction.

There was one surprise over the weekend and it happened when we called my wife’s mom on Mothers Day. She congratulated us on one year of marriage and then said to us “The first three years are the hardest”.

Hang on. Three Years? I thought that first year was the hardest but now that I’ve reached a year it changed to three years? To be fair the first year wasn’t that tough and most of the problems arose because I can be stupid. The key to my successful marriage is the fact that I’ve learned to stop doing ridiculously stupid things. Sometimes the difference between success and failure is asking the question “Is this a good idea?” and only proceeding if the answer is yes.

Speaking of porn and family, I've got some new LA Metblogs stuff here.

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A Year, A Discussion and Free Food

Believe it or not, Slackmistress and I are just four days away from celebrating our first anniversary. To kick off what will be a week of celebration I’d like to share this bit of marital conversation which too place in the car last night when I said:


“You’ll never guess what I did today”
- “You sent out that thank you card like you promised?”
“Nope”
- “You cleaned the bathroom without someone reminding you?”
“No...how many more of these do you have?”
- “A few more, you should probably just tell me what you did”
“Now I don’t want to.”


(It's like one of these videos without all that looking)

Luckily we were in no mood to argue (we rarely are). We were on our way to one of the happiest places on earth, Dodger Stadium to see the Dodgers play the Mets from the AM/PM All You Can Eat Pavilion. If there’s one thing that makes baseball better it’s free food at the game; $25 a ticket and then you go nuts.

“I’ll take six hot dogs, some nachos, peanuts, popcorn and soda. How much is that....zero bucks? It’s a deal.”

More on the game over at LA Metblogs.

Finally, something new and exciting for the internet from my wife.

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Economic Stimulus

On Friday morning I got my $600 from the Treasury Department. This is part of the much publicized Economic Stimulus Package that is supposed to help me ignore the fact that I’m paying $4 a gallon for gas and that there is a war going on (to name just a few unpleasant realities).

I don’t know about you but I’ve got mixed feelings about this, sure I need the money, but I feel that accepting it might be interpreted as giving tacit approval of a criminal administration. Is it possible to say “I hate what you’ve done to our country but thanks for the cash” and not feel compromised? I’m having a hard time feeling good about this.

P.S. New LA Metblog post here.

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Place Holder

More Muxtape goodness can be found here.

The track listed as unknown is called Solphodine and it's one of the best songs you'll ever hear about an over the counter sleep aid, unless you count booze as a sleep aid.

Back with a full post sometime in the next two days. In the meantime fans of baseball and/or names that make you giggle should click here.

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